Act like you’ve already won.

A few weeks ago, I was on a Zoom call with a potential partner, and I found myself agreeing to things I didn't necessarily want to agree to.

The scope of the project kept getting bigger, the timeline got a little tighter, and the pay basically stayed the same.

Normally, I'd push back, but something was off. I found myself smiling and nodding like some sort of people-pleasing robot.

By the time I got off the call, I had almost committed to delivering nearly twice the work for three-quarters of what I'd charge. I know better than that. I've been doing this for over six years, understand my worth, and am fully confident in the value I deliver.

But in that moment, I wasn't acting like myself. I was acting like someone desperate for approval.

I sat down with my wife, Jennifer, and talked her through what happened. As I was wrapping up, she opened her computer with a little smile and showed me this tweet from our friend Dan Martell:

She didn't need to say anything else. We both knew what had just happened on that call.

Why we sell ourselves short

Over time, I've come to learn that when we operate from a place of scarcity, we make bad decisions our future selves will resent.

The version of me with a full pipeline doesn't commit to bad partner deals. And he certainly doesn't apologize for his prices or say yes when he means no. But the version on that call was thinking about what he might lose instead of what he deserved to gain.

This happens to so many entrepreneurs, especially new ones. I know because I get hundreds of emails from readers trapped in this same situation. And even my experienced entrepreneur friends admit to this problem when we’re out having a beer. We all know our true value internally, but when we get in front of a new opportunity, suddenly, we're not the confident entrepreneur anymore. Instead, we're the insecure person worried about missing out.

The cost of playing small

Back in 2019, in my first year as an entrepreneur, I nearly burned myself out for the second time in 12 months. I was charging $200/hour for work that should have been $500/hour or more. I had a roster of ten clients when I really only had the capacity for five or six. I was terrified that lead flow would dry up and I'd have to close up shop before I was even one year in.

So naturally, by month six, I found myself working 70-hour weeks, getting paid for 45, making a little less than I did at my corporate job, and resenting every minute of it. My work quality dropped, and I was exhausted beyond belief. All because I was reinforcing some narrative that this was all I was worth.

The final straw came when a client asked for a third round of free revisions on a sales playbook I was drafting. This happened because I hadn't created a clear scope of work, which is still one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned to this day. I remember staring at the email, knowing I could either keep playing small or start operating like the valuable advisor I was.

Everything changes when you shift

After that breaking point, I did something that felt really radical at the time. I doubled my rates and streamlined my service offering, reducing some of the hours I was working. I decided to focus on the stuff customers cared most about and cut out the stuff that didn’t matter.

It turns out, most of my customers were fine paying more to get more of what they wanted. And some had even been wondering why I was so cheap in the first place. One actually told me, "I almost didn't hire you because your rates were so low I assumed you weren't very good." Talk about a punch in the face.

Within six months, I was making more money and working less. But more importantly, the entire energy of my business transformed. Clients started treating me like an expert instead of a random vendor. They showed up prepared, implemented my advice, and got significantly better results. And I had time and energy to do incredibly valuable work!

When you operate from abundance and from the truth of your track record, everybody's situation improves.

How to actually make the shift

This isn't about fake confidence or delusional thinking. It's about making decisions from your actual track record instead of your fears. Here are a few pieces of advice that worked for me:

Document proof of your success. Back when I was an advisor, I'd keep a "big wins file" in my Google Drive, and read through all of the big victories before any new call. I'm not talking about folks who say they enjoyed working with me. I mean massive improvements in revenue, process, cost savings, etc. It helped me remember my present reality at the time, instead of letting me fall victim to my insecurities.

Use the 10x question. Whenever I feel the urge to undervalue myself, I ask, "If I had 10 more opportunities coming next week, would I take this?" If the answer is no, it's a hard pass. This simple little reframe cuts through scarcity thinking almost instantly.

Create friction before committing. Back in 2020, in my second year of advising, I decided to never firmly agree to anything on a call. My default response became, "This sounds interesting. Let me look over my calendar, and I'll get back to you in the next 48 hours." This pause has saved me from countless bad decisions.

Peel back every layer with questions. Before quoting anything, I ask questions until I'm almost annoying. What exactly do you need? In what format? By when? How will you measure success? The clearer the scope, the more confident I became in my pricing.

How I responded to the client

Remember that call I mentioned at the beginning? I emailed them two days later and withdrew from the opportunity. I explained that after reflection, I couldn't deliver the quality they deserved within their parameters.

They came back with more budget and a more reasonable timeline.

I still said no.

Because the version of me that's already won doesn't just charge more. He chooses better projects and knows that the wrong opportunity at a good price is still the wrong opportunity.

The Bottom Line

That future, successful and happy version of you? They're not actually in the future. They're literally available right now, waiting for you to make the decisions you've already proven you deserve.

You've already built something. You've already solved problems others can't solve. You've already created value that didn't exist before you showed up to make it happen.

The only question is whether you'll let that person make your next decision.

This whole mindset I'm describing isn't about believing you're more successful than you are. It's about stopping the habit of pretending you're less successful than you've already become.

That person exists right now.

You just have to let them lead.

P.S. If you're looking to become your own solopreneur, or struggling to make the transitions like this effectively, I can help. I've recorded a complete behind-the-scenes course on how to build, launch, and scale your own one-person business. It's called The Creator MBA. 111 lessons and 19 hours of video, including a 2.5-hour Start from Scratch quick start workshop. Join 6,500+ other online solopreneurs and entrepreneurs here.